November Has Arrived

November has already arrived. 2018 has to have been the year that has felt the fastest so far. February was just here!

We are entering my least favorite time of the year; between the waning daylight, the onset of freezing temperatures, and the holidays (which stress me and out tend to make me feel depressed), November and December are two of the months I have to be most proactive and diligent in the moment to keep my mood from plummeting. Last year, I had my first relative triumph over the season, managing to keep the darkest depression, stir-craziness, and anxiety at bay, so hopefully I can build on that foundation and think my way through another good winter.

I am still waiting for my next obsession to set in—one that is better suited for cold winter weather. I’m not feeling the jigsaw puzzle craze I had going last year. I have a couple of projects going, but they aren’t the alluring “candy” that a true special interest is; rather, they are something I’m neutral about. To ward off my severe winter depression, I need an activity that truly brings me joy and distraction. However, for a special interest to be genuine (and deeply intriguing), in my opinion, it has to have an organic genesis. In other words, I can’t force one or choose one from a lineup. Even though I know it’ll nullify my pre-winter anxiety if I have an obsession fall soon upon me, I have to be patient and open-minded, just letting inspiration and interests come naturally and carry out their courses without my mental dictatorship. For example, I can’t will my brain to become gung-ho about jigsaw puzzles again; perhaps that draw will resurface, but for now, sitting down and working on one is as unappealing as watching cartoons, which is to say, not at all.

And so, I will remain hopeful that something sparks my interest soon and soak up the remaining fall weather as much as possible in the meantime.

1 Comment

  1. It’s a frustrating feeling. You want to feel that passionate about something again, but the magic is gone and you just have to wait till the next thing is there. Hope you find yours soon.

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