Making Progress

I got most of the vinyl tile flooring installed yesterday. It was surprisingly simple after all of the preparation work was done, much in the way that painting a room is. It’s not quite finished yet because I had a finite amount of time to devote to the project yesterday, sandwiched between work assignments, Comet’s rehab, and errands. I may finish up today, although there are some tricky angles to cut into the remaining tiles because the baseboards aren’t straight in the room and I have to work around the door jamb.
I did my self-directed therapy yesterday morning because I forgot to on Monday because of the holiday. I’m working on addressing the depression side of things right now, since I focused on anxiety for the first six weeks. Although PTSD is in a class far above all else in terms of difficulty in eliminating, generalized anxiety itself is a lower hanging, easier “fruit” to work on improving compared to depression (at least as they present themselves for me). It’s hard to say whether I’ve been more or less depressed than usual lately because it’s just not that simple. There are lots of factors that go into my perception of my mood, energy, outlook, and how I feel emotionally in general. Over the weekend, I had a helpful conversation with my mom about the antidepressant I was prescribed. I haven’t started it yet, but I’m considering it, though my takeaway from my discussion with her was that it wasn’t a drug she’s particularly recommend for me. There’s more research I want to do before I try it or definitely decide it’s not for me. Although I’m interested in taking it in some ways, the horrible melatonin reaction has put a significant damper on my openness to give it a shot.
The weather has been stellar: hot, sunny, and fresh. My body is achy today from the past couple days of kneeling, scrubbing, bending over, and using poor ergonomics and unusual muscles for these home projects. For example, sanding the deck on hands and knees is quite uncomfortable after just a few minutes. The spring snow has also fallen, by which I mean billows of white dandelion fluff and golden pollen dust, which float aloft the warm currents and settle like pillowy snowbanks along the margins of the road. I’m itchy and sneezy, although thankfully, I don’t have terrible seasonal allergies. I guess what I don’t have to deal with in hay fever is more than made up for by the extent and severity of my food allergies.
The landscaper we hired finally came yesterday in the late afternoon to remove some of the huge brush pile that Ben has created from all of the dead trees, bushes, and vines he’s chopped down. Removing that clutter will help the yard look fresher and larger. The guy we hired kept postponing the day he was planning to come, so it’s been a long wait. We are slowly getting this place looking better.
My stomach has been bad again, so I want to call my gastroenterologist and see if my rescheduled colonoscopy can be moved sooner. It’s not until early July. The bloating and pain continues, so waiting is potentially detrimental to my health. To be fair, I’ve now cancelled it twice, so it’s entirely my fault. I wish they could just do it without all the fasting and drinking prep. Some day…

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